Whose house this year? What do you mean you don’t know if you’ll be here or not? How will I know how much food to buy? Are you bringing that partner of yours? All questions to send you frantically searching for excuses to get you out of Christmas with your relatives.
If you do find yourself in that situation, we’ve crafted five easy steps to help you get out of seeing your relatives at Christmas:
1. Volunteer in a soup kitchen.
Volunteering is a good idea whether you want to see your family or not. There are plenty of charities who could do with an extra pair of hands, and helping those in need, who are lonely, or are doing it tough is definitely the best way to spread Christmas cheer. You’ll also get to be with people who are happy to see you.
2. Take the shift no one wants.
When everyone disappears as your boss walks around asking who wants to work on Christmas Day, get in there straight away. Not only will your impress your boss with your enthusiasm, you’ll also get a much needed boost to your bank account and have a legitimate excuse to avoid your relatives.
3. Pull a sickie.
That pretend pain in your stomach that you don’t want to pass on to your family, and the sight of food is enough to make you keel over in agony. The wiser family member may call your bluff, so be imaginative and descriptive. Refer to volcanos. ‘Krakatoa’, ‘Vesuvius’, ‘Mount St. Helens’, and use lines like ‘I’ve got such a headache from being so dehydrated, I just need to lie down’.
4. Book a holiday.
You’ve been working hard all year and you’ve got the savings to prove it. What better way to get out of seeing your relatives, than being thousands of kilometres away. Taking this avenue does come with conditions. You can’t just hop on a plane to go locally, that’ll seem dodgy. You want a good distance and preferably a different time zone. And just when the family is getting festive on Christmas day for that group phone call “Sorry I missed your call, what time is it there again?”
5. Tell them the truth.
You’ll probably be met with a bit of hostility at first, but if you stand your ground, you can head to the beach on Christmas Day with your favourite book and bask in the serenity, guilt free.